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I'm Not Evil, I'm a Chaotic Neutral Murderhobo

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Post by Jeannie Rose January 31st 2022, 9:18 pm

Jeannie clapped her hands impressed with dabs great speech. you are a grand Poobah?  Neat do you get a fancy hat, that job sounds like it should come with a fancy hat everyone can see and acknowledge your poobahyness right away.

She then turns to Terri "umm what exactly am I supposed to question?  
Candy comes in a wrapper not sure where you're going with that.  If you think it's odd cause that's future stuff. maybe it's a glitch. Or they couldn't think of how to make candy mid-evil and left it alone, it was good is what matters huh teddy?

The bear nods his head in agreement, Jeannie takes out a handkerchief and whips some chocolate smugs off his face.

Or do you mean how big bugs are asking us to help fight knights when usually the knights are the good guys?

I thought that was weird but maybe the gamemaster thought doing something different would be fun. Right, so you want to find someone? lucky for you I'm good at that.
She pulls out one of those old-time feathery pens and paper from her backpack.

What do they look like if I make a doodle of them we can show it to people in the town to see if they saw them.  Oh, would you happen to have something that belonged to them on you?

If we knew their scent me and teddy can track them easier.
Jeannie hopes Terri doesn't think it's too odd a request for something with their smell on it. she'd hate to make her new friend uncomfortable.
================================hey arrowman you know if you want to have your trick arrows be a arcane archer http://dnd5e.wikidot.com/fighter:arcane-archer  same thing but with magic instead of tech

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Post by PsychoEllodere January 31st 2022, 9:43 pm

"Wh- we have to find the Silver Lady ourselves? No hint as to direction, nothing?"

The masked monk asked, belatedly as it appeared the Queen had already flown out of hearing range. Her arms rose in irritation and dropped defeatedly as she rolled her head back. She thought as she stared towards the sky.

It probably wasn't too strange to head towards the nearest town to ask questions, as the witch may have implied. Hopefully that's the real reason she said that.

"We could head to the town, yea. Is it the direction the knights came from?"

Her eyes then went to Jeannie and Teddy. It may be noticeable how she purposely positioned herself away from the bear, as if the range was a barrier between them. She was still cautious of him.

"An appearance... it's been a bit more than two years, umm..."

She began to describe their basic qualities of appearance. Two people, man and a woman. Woman in her forties, man in his early fifties, wrinkles. The woman with brown hair, like her own, the man balding.

"I don't have anything of theirs on me. Also, what I was questioning was the fact an 'evil knight' had cookies, along with the mod- future design of the wrapper. I don't like what that references. Speaking oooofff..."

She stepped back so that she could look at both Dab and Jeanie, with the bear in tow.

"I would be a lot more comfortable going with you guys if we can go without killing anyone else, unless we have to? Just in case that what I'm thinking is correct?"

Once that's out of the way, then Terri is fine to follow on to the start of their adventure. Maybe they'll even find somebody else to help them out once they reach town.

____________________________________________________________________________________________________________
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Post by The Nekromonga February 1st 2022, 3:35 am

Dabbler was wearing a witch’s cap, which she pointed to in Jeannie’s excitement. “Oh you mean this old thing?” Dabbler took off her hat and showed it to Jeannie, but not let her hold it. For the very good reason that it growled and showed sharp teeth inside. She puts it back on.

“Clearly this is a morally gray story, where man is not necessarily good and monster not necessarily evil. Perhaps we must weight the moral merit of each side based on their actions, not merely appearances.” Dabbler waxed philosophically, while listening to Terri’s concerns. They were looking for a couple of middle aged, parent types.

“Well, your parents won’t be that hard to find, they’re not going to be wearing those white towels the knights wear. Okay to the town!”

The town of Boston College was a walled off settlement, with many watch towers and walls that were heavily guarded. If they stroll in being murderhobos it’d end badly even for them. It was now time to role play.

While they were still far from the town entrance, Dabbler decided she needed to drop the chaos witch look. “Prest-o change-o!” Dabbler made some mystical hand signs and she begins transforming, complete with some squishing and crunching sound effects of her extra arms folding back into her body and her skin becoming clear and healthy. Dabbler was now replaced with an innocent looking teenager.

“And this one. Ursus Disguisus Canis!” Dabbler snapped her fingers and chaotic energies swirled around Teddy, casting an illusion that turned the bear into a large Tibetan mastiff, dogs being a bit more tolerated in civilized settings than bears.

“let’s go let’s go! Oh by the way don’t call me Dabbler… I’m Samantha.” Dabbler even modified her voice mid sentence. If you weren’t around for her transformation, there was no way to tell this was an evil, ahem, totally not evil, just chaotic neutral, witch.

And rightly so. Once they approached the gates, one could tell what kind of town the Silver Knights were running. A gallows had been fixed up outside the gates, and four bodies were hanged there, sacks still over their heads. The bodies were fresh. Each carried a sign on their body, displaying the crime they had committed. One was ‘bread thief’ a second was ‘horse thief’ the third was ‘murderer’ and the fourth was ‘insulted the silver lady and didn’t say sorry’. A town guard with a halbard spots the trio.
“Halt. Who goes there, what is your business?”

“Please sir, I am but a simple seamstress’s apprentice, traveling with my sisters through this dangerous land…” ‘Samantha’ made the innocent eyes.

The Knight eyed Jeannie, dog Teddy, and Terri. “…I see. And where are your parents?” The knight asked the trio. Dabs looked at them to keep the story going.



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Post by Jeannie Rose February 1st 2022, 8:54 pm

Jeannie has happily amused with dabblers magic tricks awe teddy you make a cutie puppy!  She'd have to ask dabs if she can make him stay a doggy when things go back to normal. That way she can keep Teddy her parents would probably be more ok with her bringing a dog home than a bear.

Huh, the town with its gallows gave her a dragon age two fill.  her and dabbler would have to be careful in case the knights here shared the ones from the game's thoughts on mages and elves.

When a knight approached them, Samantha began telling a story to him about them being traveling sisters.  How fun Jeannie liked the idea of playing sisters with them.

He asked about their parents, huh Mandy was looking for her parents right? this could be a good opportunity for some information gathering.

She plays along with dabs story, she starts crying dog teddy does his part as the good dog. Snuggling up by her to comfort his distressed master.

I miss mommy and daddy, they disappeared, I was out playing with teddy when we came home they were gone, just poor Mandy.

She blows her nose with her handkerchief and whips some tears away before continuing her story.

Teddy was so sweet trying to cheer us up, then big sissy  Sammy got back from her apprentice, job and we told her.

She decided going out to look for them would be best, that's what brought us to your fair city, we thought someone here might have seen them. please help us mister knight we don't want to be orphans.

she shows them the doddle she made to see if he recognized them.


Last edited by Jeannie Rose on February 2nd 2022, 3:23 am; edited 1 time in total
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Post by PsychoEllodere February 2nd 2022, 3:20 am

"Oh, huh."

...For some reason, somehow, Terri had managed to block out the fact that Dabbler had multiple arms- not the weirdest thing she saw, then again. Aaaaaand she'd also guessed correctly they were looking for her parents. Damnit. She definitely could have worded the description of them differently- hell, she could have just said they weren't her parents, say they were old friends or something. She didn't feel like she should lie then, though. A bit late for that idea.

"Samantha it is. And uh... guess I could be called Mandy, if need be."

The so-called heroes proceeded on their journey, traveling through the entrance of the village. Terri's eyes almost immediately went to the gallows. Her pace slowed alongside the group. It may not take too much observation to show she wasn't used to visuals like death, especially in a setting like this. Anything more than a death on a picture would likely cause her to flinch, something to get used to.

Her senses immediately rose once the knight got to them. She was ready to fight in all but stance, though managed to stop herself as conversation struck. She decided to play along:

"...I just took a nap and they were gone. Don't know if something took them, or... if they just left."

She wasn't too great at acting. Luckily, her reserved posture was hopefully enough to make something convincing, as she began to cross her arms as if shy. Was this her way of trying to act scared, like Jeannie was doing? Only she didn't have a handkerchief, and she was wearing a mask. Hopefully that part wasn't questioned.

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Post by The Nekromonga February 4th 2022, 8:35 pm

The guard, seemingly skeptical at first, relents, and signals the gate guards to open up. A small side door opens for the small number of new arrivals.

"You may enter and seek shelter, perhaps information of your family among the refugees. Heed me well travelers. The Silver Lady's word is law, and the Crusaders are the bearers of her word. Break faith with us at thy own peril."

"Oh thank you sir. Silver Lady's blessings on you." Dabblermantha clasped her hands and imitated the local greeting.

"And also on thee." He returned the platitude, then resumed his post at the gate, having nothing more to say.

The town was dotted with lots of tents and trading areas, survivors of this madness who only wished to be safe. That safety was ensured by patrols of heavily armed and armored Silver Knights, who kept peace and order with a heavy hand. There was a part of town where they had set up stockades, where 'sinners' and 'criminals' were stripped naked, whipped, and publicly humiliated. The people kept their distance from the Knights, as it was clear the knights' protection was synonymous with iron fisted oppression.

"So you said your place was somewhere in here? Lead the way. We've got your back." Dabbler checked again.

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Post by Jeannie Rose February 4th 2022, 10:45 pm

Yay super acting skills for the win!  Dabblers plan had got them into the city. " Huh, he seemed nicer them other knights. too bad he couldn't just tell us where Mandy's parents were at.  He did mention some refugees to ask so that's a start.

She looks around it was a big city. Man, it's going to take forever to search this place.  Wonder where to start?

Teddy barks by a tree. No, I don't think her parents are up a tree Teddy.  The bear dog shakes his head, No boss the sign!

Oh right. She holds the missing person's sign she made. Right now how to stick it? She decides to uses one of her arrows to stick it to the tree.

Right now think you sniff out them refugees?
Do I have to? They might smell funny.
Well, you are a dog now.
Jeannie then turns to the others. Oh, you live here mandy? your place would be a  good base to start our search from.  

Maybe if we're lucky your parents will be there and we won't have to look too far.  Just in case I got these.

She pulls out of her bag a large stack of papers. To keep herself from getting bored during the long walk to the town she made a comical amount of copies of the sketch she made.

As mandy lead them through the town she stopped to pin them up just in case they needed help with the search if no one was home when they got there.  Teddy comically tugs at here cloak to make sure his absent-minded master doesn't stray too far from the group.

Jeannie notices the stockades. Huh, they must have a pretty high crime rate if having to go that far with criminals seems a bit too much though. I hope your place is on the nice side of town Mandy.
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Humor : why so serious ? seriously just cause we have to face life threatening danger on a daily basis don't mean we can't have fun with it ,instead off oh no we're doomed be like me and think gee wonder how i'll survive this....oh you don't have heal powers well you might not find the evil deathtrap as amusing i do then
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Post by PsychoEllodere February 7th 2022, 6:19 am

"Mandy" listened to the guard, confirming her thoughts on the situation. She responded:

"Noted."

The party moved forward. Once Terri was confident enough, she responded to their questions:

"I think we're a little off from where I live, but it's hard to tell. The landmarks are either changed or don't exist anymore, and again, it's been awhile since I've last been around here."

Her answer hopefully answered both of their questions and recommendations. The woman's gaze went to the stockades, and much like how she reacted to the gallows, she recoiled. It took a good amount of effort to make sure she wasn't too noticeable with her reaction to the scene. She wanted to attack the knights. Break whatever held the people there.

Of course, though, that could very likely make things worse. Had the situation not been so high-stressed, she probably would have attacked the knights immediately. Too many lives were at stake.

She looked to Jeannie, after her statement.

"When anything negative relating to some idol is a crime, then yea. Probably high."

Great. Onto the more serious matters:

"...This might sound stupid, but we could split up, cover more ground. Find something either relating to my parents, or whatever the insect thing wanted us to do."

Terri's eyes went to the bear-turned-mastiff.

"We could whistle if we find anything, or need help. Then uh... Teddy, was it? Teddy could howl for us to gather, around here?"

Then again, her plan could be the stupidest idea for the situation. After all, it was unfamiliar territory. If one of them were in trouble, how far off would the others be to help or protect them?

Then again, given how the two held themselves, Terri felt like she was just thinking for herself, in getting in trouble she couldn't handle.

____________________________________________________________________________________________________________
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Post by The Nekromonga February 12th 2022, 9:19 am

They were brainstorming about how they were going to tackle this. The knights in town didn’t know who they were so they weren’t in imminent danger. “Well, we’re in a relatively safe town if we don’t do anything weird. Let’s try it. But first, you guys wait… I’ll be right back.” It was a strange sight seeing Dabbler simply walking and skipping instead of doing her POOF-I’m-there shtick.

Once she was sure no one was in view, she looked around for something to work with. She spies a chicken coop and rushed over. Being callous about it she zaps the chickens with chaos, exploding one violently. “Oops. Much too strong.”

She zaps the other chickens in the coop, now panicking, just enough voltage to stop their little hearts. She gathers up five dead chickens and casts a spell. “Call of Corax!” From the bodies of the chickens sprang five magical evil ravens. The familiars obeyed their master and follow her back to her companions.

“Alllriiiighty! These ravens will let us stay in contact with each other, so we can tell each other if we find anything. Any other suggestions before we fan out?”

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Post by Jeannie Rose February 12th 2022, 11:52 pm

Jeannie is amused with dabblers' tricks but kinda disappointed she wasn't trying to make magic fried chicken.  
Teddy meanwhile is relieved she didn't overdo it when changing him into a dog.

Oh so like walkie-talkie birdies? neat! yeah, I have a really good idea to cover more ground with the searching and hopefully make it easier! But I will require a large wheel of cheese the biggest we can find. She stretches out her arms to show how big.

She wonders about where to get it. Then looks at dabbler. Hey, can you like magically make it?  Pull it out of your hat maybe I love the pulling stuff out of the hat trick.
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driving everyone else insane
i'm the conductor of the crazy train Smile

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Location : where ever my next adventure is :)
Job : universe's greatest bounty hunter
Humor : why so serious ? seriously just cause we have to face life threatening danger on a daily basis don't mean we can't have fun with it ,instead off oh no we're doomed be like me and think gee wonder how i'll survive this....oh you don't have heal powers well you might not find the evil deathtrap as amusing i do then
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Post by PsychoEllodere February 18th 2022, 7:59 pm

So the witch can use her legs without group support after all. Good for her.

Terri crossed her arms and stood in silence as Dabbler went off to do her thing. Once she came back, the monk was pleasantly surprised. She wondered if she could learn a spell or two someday, it seemed useful. People can just learn it, right?

"Definitely useful. Don't have any more ideas from myself."

Her gaze, belatedly, went to Jeannie after she made her suggestion.

"...Why would you need a large wheel of cheese?"

For a moment, Terri pondered if the woman lied about being a bounty hunter. Her methods didn't seem profoundly professional, not to her at least. Then again, she never watched any of those bounty hunter shows, maybe this was how they did things.

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Post by The Nekromonga February 19th 2022, 7:53 pm

Dabbler wondered what she was up to. She did in fact, have some cheeses. Some shakes her hat and several types fell out, wrapped in plastic. She sorts out the cheeses.

"Cheddar cheese, Mozarella cheese, Swiss cheese, Parmesan, Feta cheese! Cottage... eww this one's gone bad." she chucks the fouled cottage into the nearby bushes.

____________________________________________________________________________________________________________
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Quote : Neko is 9 now. Neko has many medical issues.

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Humor : I made a Lesbian Feminist Ninja Vampire Samurai.
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Post by Jeannie Rose February 19th 2022, 11:57 pm

Jeannie smiles happily with dabblers ability to produce the cheese. She gathers the cheese together in a large pile and opens the wrappings so the smell of the cheeses could come out.

Right now to put my master plan into action, teddy stands by the pile and wag your tail to fan out the smell of the cheese.

Ok boss.  The bear dog goes over after a few tries getting used to his new form's tail.  He eventually gets the hang of it.  Jeannie then starts making squeaky sounds.

After a while rats can be seen popping up from their hiding places.  Sticking their little noses up in the air they smell the cheese and begin gathering around teddy and Jeannie.

Jeannie stands up on a bench the rats stand at attention waiting for her to speak.  Rodents of the city lend me your ears! my friends and I have a wonderful deal for you.

She points to the cheese and the crowd of rats squeaky excitedly.  That's right furry friends for just a little bit of your time all that cheese can be yours.

She holds up the drawling of Terri's parents.  I'm trying to find these people they leave somewhere in this city. Seeing how you guys get around you probably have seen them right?

A fat rat somewhat bigger than the others wearing a crown emerges from the group. He goes up to Jeannie and nods his head. They talk in squeaks a bit.

Then it holds out it'd paw and Jeannie shakes it. She then turns to her likely confused companions. Yay, the rat king says they know where their house is and will take us there. Thanks your rattyness.

The rats gather the cheese and line up behind the king.

He points his tail in a direction, indicating to follow them that way.

Right, follow me! or them, me following them? this way.
Jeannie falls in the line joining the cheese parade. Teddy follows along behind Jeannie.
Jeannie Rose
Jeannie Rose
Mega Poster!
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Status :
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Quote : crazy but that's how i roll
driving everyone else insane
i'm the conductor of the crazy train Smile

Warnings : 0 Warnings
Number of posts : 2488
Location : where ever my next adventure is :)
Job : universe's greatest bounty hunter
Humor : why so serious ? seriously just cause we have to face life threatening danger on a daily basis don't mean we can't have fun with it ,instead off oh no we're doomed be like me and think gee wonder how i'll survive this....oh you don't have heal powers well you might not find the evil deathtrap as amusing i do then
Registration date : 2014-10-22

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Post by PsychoEllodere February 22nd 2022, 4:42 am

Terri was momentarily bewildered by Dabbler's "trick". She contemplates whether that was actually magic at work, or if Dabbler just had cheese stored in her hat. No, it didn't geometrically make sense if no magic was involved, but a lot of things weren't making sense recently.

The events afterward bewildered her further. The monk was at a loss for words, almost literally.

"You- wh- huh?"

She loosely pointed a hand at the rats, then Jeannie, then the rants, then either of them.

"Huh? You speak r- what? What the fuck??"

Then the rat with the crown came out, and Terri's knees almost buckled and collapsed as she momentarily lost control of her body. Had her face not been covered, she may almost look pleadingly to something.

"What!??"

She squeaked in desperation.

The woman would have to be given a short moment of time to collect herself, before rising back to her feet. She was yet still, before finally following the bounty hunter and the... Rat King. She had to focus on more rational thought, if she didn't she probably would soon collapse.

They were inconspicuous, at least previously. She didn't personally want to draw too much attention, but a rat gathering could have attracted some eyes.

Terri looked around herself, slightly repositioning her mask for an attempt at better peripheral. It wasn't successful, but they no doubt got some stares. She didn't suppose the knights would have problems with a rat-whisperer, but her pace slightly sped up in hopes to get out of their location before someone could question it.

____________________________________________________________________________________________________________
[Terri Saffron] ||
PsychoEllodere
PsychoEllodere

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Quote : "I’ll wear spandex, have a stupid gimmick and kick ass regardless!"

Warnings : 0 Warnings
Number of posts : 30
Registration date : 2018-06-01

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Post by The Nekromonga February 24th 2022, 9:35 pm

The rats perform their function and eventually led the adventuring trio to their desired location. They find the district where an elderly couple, presumably Terri’s parents, were entertaining a trio of crusaders serving news via a large scroll.

“This is a conscription notice! The Crusade requires men at arms to fight against the evil empress Vespania!” the crusader read from the scroll.

“Are you crazy? …Well I’m too old to fight! I’m over 50!” He said in protest.

“Then you must make a contribution the effort. Gold or food or supplies.” They countered, menacingly approaching the home without permission.

“We don’t have anything! Everything in this world is messed up! Get off our property, we don’t want anything to do with your war!"

“Consider yourself drafted then. Men, seize them both.” The crusaders draw steel and approach, angering Terri’s father. “Don’t you dare touch my wife!” He shoves one of them and puts up his fists in a bare knuckle fighting stance. The crusader struck Mister Saffron on the head when he resisted, knocking him out, causing Missus Saffron to shriek in fear.

Dabbler witnessed what was going on and despite the presence of the crusaders, opened up a portal beneath Mister Saffron and the knight holding him to fall through and be deposited beside Terri on the soft grass. Dabbler teleported over to ensure Terri’s father was safe and didn't hit his head on a rock or something. "I gota ya mister Black Belt!"

The crusader didn’t take to the sudden portal well. “Witch! You’ll pay for this!” He raised his sword to attack Terri and Jeanie, intending on running them through like a kebab.

____________________________________________________________________________________________________________
Dragon Girl Experience
Dabbler Experience
The Steel Sage Experience
Thalassophobia Experience
Talona
Lady Deathblow Experience
The Nekromonga
The Nekromonga
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Quote : Neko is 9 now. Neko has many medical issues.

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Number of posts : 2582
Location : Philippines
Age : 35
Job : Architect, Master Builder
Humor : I made a Lesbian Feminist Ninja Vampire Samurai.
Registration date : 2013-01-18

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Post by Jeannie Rose February 24th 2022, 10:59 pm

Huh, these knights really need to read a book or something on being better knights Jeannie thought.  First, they were chasing a lady and her baby, sure they were a bug lady a slug kid but they weren't hurting anybody.

Now Jeannie and company happened across them roughing up old people. how unchivalrous can these naughty knights be?

Luckily got Terri’s daddy to safety. time to teach these meanies a lesson let's get them teddy!

Teddy growls in response to Jeannie's order to charge.  Jeannie draws her sword and the wacky duo moves to engage the knights.

The one charging them was a priority, Jeannie skillfully deflects the incoming sword with hers, like a bullfighter she sidesteps the knight causing him to tumble aside.  

As he goes to get up Jeannie rise her sword ready to make her attack. Hello. My name is Inigo Montoya. You killed my father. Prepare to die”,   Well kinda Jeannie remembered Terri saying to try not to kill anyone.  So she uses some fancy swashbuckling to relive the knight of his sword “You mean you wish to surrender to me? Very well, I accept”.

Meanwhile teddy happy that while smaller than he was as a bear dabbler choose a still pretty big dog to turn him into.  

Using his size as an effective weapon he sits on the one Mister Saffron had pushed early pinning him to the ground. Teddy growls a bit and shows his teeth to let him know trying to get up wouldn't be in his best interest.

With  Jeannie and Teddy dealing with those two that left one for dabber or Teri to deal with.
Jeannie Rose
Jeannie Rose
Mega Poster!
Mega Poster!

Status :
Online
Offline

Quote : crazy but that's how i roll
driving everyone else insane
i'm the conductor of the crazy train Smile

Warnings : 0 Warnings
Number of posts : 2488
Location : where ever my next adventure is :)
Job : universe's greatest bounty hunter
Humor : why so serious ? seriously just cause we have to face life threatening danger on a daily basis don't mean we can't have fun with it ,instead off oh no we're doomed be like me and think gee wonder how i'll survive this....oh you don't have heal powers well you might not find the evil deathtrap as amusing i do then
Registration date : 2014-10-22

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