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Post by Guest August 14th 2016, 1:56 pm

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Last edited by Fort/Sam on June 16th 2018, 2:06 pm; edited 8 times in total (Reason for editing : changing the costume and names)
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Post by Thorgron August 15th 2016, 7:47 am

Alright Fort, all in all this is a very solid app with very few things that need edited. Your history and powers are both perfectly acceptable. Your weaknesses however need a little tweaking. What I'd like to see would be one of three things, from which you can take your pick.

1. You could increase the potency of her oxygen weakness, making it that despite her stamina she can hold her breath no longer than the average human.

2. You could add another weakness that makes her less durable against something other than a specific item. A lot of times the super durable types pick "weak against magic" though that makes less ends in this case. Basically pick something much broader than an item another person would essentially need your permission To know about and use.

3. Finally you could come up with your own additional weakness in some manner that I haven't suggested. Maybe she has a deadly allergy of some kind. Maybe she is irrationally terrified of some common thing despite her incredible power. Really the sky is the limit with this option so long as it is a solid weakness.

Once you do one of those three things, I'd say you're just about set. If you have any questions feel free to hop on the cbox or reply to this app. Happy editing! Smile

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Post by Guest August 16th 2016, 3:53 pm

Okay, thought about it for a while. How about this: the buzzing of the bees? She’s terrified of the sound, not because she’s allergic to bees (given her durability it wouldn’t make a difference if she was), but because her younger brother is. When they were both much younger, (either children or just after she got her powers, haven’t decided yet. The first does seems more likely.), her brother was stung by a bee and had a severe allergic reaction. Sam never got over the feeling of being so helpless. And today the sound is enough to remind her of this feeling, causing her to have a breakdown. Bees aren’t that common that it would be a serious problem in day-to-day life, but not that uncommon that its’ impossible to find our and use against her (either by real bees or simply the sound).

Not the most inspiring of weaknesses, I know, but giving her and allergy or something might potentially be giving her a crimpling weakness. Her real name is public knowledge so every crook that knows how to hack a computer, or can pay someone to do it, would be able to gain access to her medical record, learn about the allergy and weaponized it against her. This would have put a stop to her carrier several years ago. The bee allergy would be in her brother’s record, but not everyone would immediately make a connection with Sam being present and not having taken it well. They could for example learn in from a friend, or a neighbour.

So if the bee stuff above isn’t okay, I’ll just take the oxygen need to human levels. Just though it was something normal all those flyers could do.
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Post by Thorgron August 16th 2016, 5:55 pm

Well if I'm being honest here, the point is to give them a serious weakness, something that if exploited would be extremely detrimental to them and not just in an emotional way. Otherwise you end up being superman, no one can touch you physically so they have to do it mentally and mental weaknesses can often be skated around by the RPer. I'm not in any way saying that you would do this, but its a sort of safety net we have to make sure that everyone can be beaten in some way. This is why I'm going to say go with the normal human amount of breath weakness. It presents a situation where despite her immense durability and strength she could still be hurt and even potentially killed (not without your permission of course).

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Post by Guest August 17th 2016, 2:56 pm

Okay, oxygen it is.
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Post by Thorgron August 17th 2016, 2:59 pm

Approved until stated otherwise

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Post by Shadowoof June 15th 2018, 2:35 pm

Moved for mods to looks.

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